todaysheis.me

Why be awesome, when you can be flawesome?

When we’re younger we strive to become this perfect version of ourselves, seeing our flaws as something we need to work on.

It’s taken me the best part of fifty years to accept who I am, embracing my imperfections.

Because being flawesome is not just making peace with your flaws; it’s knowing that without them, you would not be you.

6 Min Reading

A lot can change in one fleeting moment.

You never quite forget the moment you think it’s all over. The moment you wish you hadn’t fallen out with those you love; Said the things you had to someone you care about.

Anger makes you say some silly things. But at that moment you hope beyond hope that those you are about to leave behind will forget the harsh words you whispered, and will remember you with the true love you had for them.

9 Min Reading

Fake diamonds look perfect. Real ones have flaws.

“I just love her energy. Doesn’t she have a great vibe? She doesn’t take any sh*t. She’s always in control of her life’. She’s got such a good heart. Why is she still single?”

Words I hear often and here’s the thing I am all those things and more but there are days I’m also all those things and less. Yes, I’m kind; caring; considerate; smart; easy on the eye (if you believe what they say).

7 Min Reading

You’re hot. He’s bothered. Hello Green-eyed monster.

“They say that being jealous is an act of love. I say that if you love and care for that person you should also learn to trust.”

You noticed her the second she walked in. There was something about her that you were inexplicably drawn to. Maybe it’s the confidence with which she strode past you, commanding your attention; Or the cheeky glint in her eye, you know she’s trouble.

9 Min Reading

Discrimination comes in all shapes and sizes.

Over the last decade equality in the workplace has been the key focus, a topic we’re hard pushed to ignore.

Whether that be gender equality, maintaining the right ethnic mix or ensuring those with disabilities are given a fair chance.

We are an equal opportunities employer seems the norm. But is it just a numbers game?

6 Min Reading

One thing they can never be again is a stranger.

If you think I’m coming back, don’t hold your breath. I’m never coming back. Even in the rare moments of weakness when all I remember is the good, I will force myself to remember why I walked away in the first place. And I’ll carry on walking, as far away from you as I can.

Yes, I know, to me you are familiar, like my favourite perfume, no matter how hard I try I can recognise your scent anywhere.

6 Min Reading

That’s right. Zero F**ks given.

” If you ever want to know the truth about something, just ask a woman over 40. When a woman turns 40, her very last f *ck flies right out of the window.”

The older I get, the less I care about what people think of me. Therefore, the older I get, the more enjoy my life. It’s really quite liberating not to give an actual f**k what others think.

8 Min Reading

Yep. It’s exactly what you think it is.

Always trust your gut. Your brain can be fooled, and your heart is an idiot (sometimes), but your gut doesn’t know how to lie.

There are few times in life I’ve been wrong about a person, but the times I have are when I’ve ignored what my gut was telling me… you know, that niggling feeling in the pit of your stomach that you can’t quite identify, so you choose to ignore it.

8 Min Reading

Unrequited love or misguided infatuation?

It’s been almost a decade since I first clapped eyes on you, yet I still remember it like it was yesterday, every last detail…

The way you looked in front of that Tequila lit bar: The way i felt when our eyes met. I tried so hard to tear my gaze away, but I just couldn’t. You captivated me. There was just something about you; you made me feel something I hadn’t in a very long time; something that resembled… hope, excitement & promise all rolled into one.

You were everything I’d hoped you’d be. A real-life manifestation of everything I looked for.

6 Min Reading

Take note, we are what we tolerate.

Feels like a strange thing to say, because it makes it seem like everything that happens to us is somehow our own fault. So let me be clear what I’m not saying is we reap what we sow.

Tolerance however is a strange notion, so familiar yet so alien. We go through our whole lives tolerating things it just becomes the norm. So much so that we stop seeing it as something we tolerate & just accept it as a way of life.

But we must be careful what we tolerate as we’re teaching people how to treat us.

6 Min Reading

Behold the Queen of Overthinking.

Yet another night passes, while i just lay there, willing sleep to come. I’m so tired yet my mind is performing its usual acrobatics. I just want to scream at those tiny voices in my head ‘for the love of god, enough already, will you just be quiet’ but as usual they continue on their own merry little journey, without giving me a second’s thought.

I pride myself on being an accomplished woman. There are so many things I do particularly well in my life, overthinking however is one of my specialities.

7 Min Reading

Being a mother is about more than giving birth.

I loved you, even before I met you and the moment I laid eyes on you I knew I would love and protect you til my dying days. I know I didn’t give birth to you, so biologically you are not mine, but none of that matters, because I promise you no matter where I am, what I’m doing, whenever you need me, I will be there for you. That’s my unspoken promise to you.

Who says that you must give birth to a child to be their mother? What about those women that step up every day and do what any good mum should?

7 Min Reading

Be with the one you love or the one that loves you?

‘Be with a man who loves you more than you love them’. A common piece of advice given in early adult life. At the time I thought this was the most ludicrous thing I’d ever heard; I mean who in their right mind would want to be with someone they didn’t love as much as the other loved them? Looking back however, I now understand exactly what it means.

We’ve all been there… In a relationship with someone who we know doesn’t tick all our boxes or get our pulse racing, but we stay, for longer than we intended, feeling unfulfilled.

5 Min Reading

I miss you, but I don’t know if I want you back.

It’s hard to pinpoint when I lost the old me – the woman who fell in love with abandonment, the eternal optimist who believed everything would work out and the hopeless romantic I once was. Yes, I still see flashes of that person, but not nearly often enough. Like many, life has hardened me, and I’ve become jaded.

But there are times I miss the old me, silly but innocent. Sometimes I just want to press reset, but life doesn’t come with a remote or buttons. Sometimes I want back the foolishly impulsive me, her heart was pure and free from hurt.

5 Min Reading

When the clock strikes midnight…

Yes, it’s that time of year again, when the clock strikes midnight, we sit there thinking about all the things we said we’d do in 2021 but never did.

But unlike every year that has passed, this year I’ve resolved not to make any resolutions. Yes, I still want to look like Gal Gadot, drink less, move more and find Mr Right, but instead of resolutions I’m going to make myself promises.

Promises that start with a cleanse. A cleanse that is as good for our soul as it is our physical being.

6 Min Reading

He never hit me, yet he hurt me every day.

Let’s be honest we’ve all been there. We thought we’d met someone warm, caring and. understanding. Someone we could see a future with, but slowly started seeing flashes of behaviour that didn’t quite fit with the person we thought they were. So, we brushed it off, thinking we were imagining it. Before we knew it, we were celebrating our one-year anniversary. Yes, we’re still together but those flashes have now become a way of life.

Congratulations you’re officially in a toxic relationship, and you know your abuser well.

10 Min Reading

Tis the season to be silly. Fa la la la la.

It’s fast approaching that time of year when we throw caution to the wind and party like it 1999. But we also know tis also the season of morning after regrets.

We’ve all been there. One minute you’re that classy woman; a picture of elegance and decorum – a flute of bubbles in one hand and nibbles in the other, charmingly working the room. But as the evening progresses you turn into the fun, uninhibited version of you. Now, you’ve had one too many glasses of bubbles, your decision-making skills are a little hazy, all etiquette straight out the window.

8 Min Reading

His ex is no threat to you. You’re the real threat.

There are two types of people in this world. Those that can stay friends with their exes and those that need a clean slate and choose to walk away. I am firmly in the first camp.

There are many reasons our relationships fail; me I like to cut my losses and walk away if I don’t feel like it’s going anywhere. That is no reflection on my ex and doesn’t make him a bad person. It just means I didn’t feel they were right for me as a life partner, but they were great people, so we were just better as friends.

9 Min Reading

I’m a strong woman because I was raised by one.

“You hate when people see you cry because you want to be that strong girl. But then you hate how nobody sees how broken and torn you are.” Farah Asif Khan.

I was lucky, I was raised by one of the strongest women I will ever be blessed to know – my grandmother. Widowed young, mother of four, grandmother to ten (well fourteen, but that’s another story), who she raised with grace, ease, and pride.

7 Min Reading

What happened to dating the old-fashioned way?

Let’s be honest, falling in love in today’s world Is tough. Gone are the days when you locked eyes with that devilishly handsome stranger across the bar; or on your daily commute; or shock, horror, gasp while you were walking down the street. if someone stopped you in the street now, you’d think you were either about to get mugged, or you’d need to get a restraining order against them.

7 Min Reading

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About Author

Why be awesome, when you can be flawesome?

A lot can change in one fleeting moment.

Fake diamonds look perfect. Real ones have flaws.

You’re hot. He’s bothered. Hello Green-eyed monster.

Discrimination comes in all shapes and sizes.

One thing they can never be again is a stranger.

That’s right. Zero F**ks given.

Yep. It’s exactly what you think it is.

Unrequited love or misguided infatuation?

Take note, we are what we tolerate.

Behold the Queen of Overthinking.

Being a mother is about more than giving birth.

Be with the one you love or the one that loves you?

I miss you, but I don’t know if I want you back.

When the clock strikes midnight…

He never hit me, yet he hurt me every day.

Tis the season to be silly. Fa la la la la.

His ex is no threat to you. You’re the real threat.

I’m a strong woman because I was raised by one.

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She changed the access.

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When the conversation flows but nothing else does.

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