Fake diamonds look perfect. Real ones have flaws.
“A diamond doesn’t start out polished and shining. It once was nothing special, but with enough pressure and time, becomes spectacular. I’m that diamond.”
Solange Nicole
“I just love her energy. Doesn’t she have a great vibe? She doesn’t take any sh*t. She’s always in control of her life’. She’s got such a good heart – so why is she still single? “
Words I, and many women hear often. Well here’s the thing I am all those things and more but there are days I’m also all those things and less. Yes, I’m kind; caring; considerate; smart; easy on the eye (if you believe what they say 🙂 ) and most of the time I have my sh*t handled. But just like you, I’m human. I also have moments of insecurity; days I just don’t want to participate in life, where I just want to lock myself in a room with nothing but headphones for company. Contrary to popular belief I don’t always have my sh*t handled, but I’ll be damned if I’ll let you see that.
Why am I single? Because that’s a choice I made. I’m a woman that knows her worth. Some might call me a high value woman, others a diamond – to me the two are interchangeable, but never high maintenance. My worth is not defined by others, it’s defined by my beliefs, my experiences, and my badges of honour (of which I have quite a few). Every man wants to be with a diamond, but not every man understands nor appreciates the journey it took to become that diamond.
As women we all have the potential to be high value, diamonds in the making. The only difference is some of us shine brighter than others. Like any rock, life & its pressures have hardened us. But what some see as hard knocks others see as a reason to shine brighter.
As Matshona Dhliwayo so eloquently put it “A diamond earns its sparkle from the pressure it endures”. With every knock a little more sparkle comes through until we become so polished it’s hard to look at us without some form of protective eyewear.
I believe every woman has the potential to shine bright but not every woman knows how. They’re so busy hiding behind the person in front of them they fail to see their true worth and beauty. Women who understand their value and know their worth won’t let anyone make them feel any less of the precious gem they are. They do however share some common traits, so if you want to tap into that inner rock to reveal your sparkle, here’s what you can learn from a high value woman.
SHE KNOWS HER WORTH.
She doesn’t seek validation from others. Every ounce of her being exudes confidence, from the way she walks and the way she talks, down to how she dresses. When you meet a woman like this, you’ll recognise her from the way she treats others and herself. There’s a quiet confidence that spills out of her soul.
SHE’LL NEVER JUST SETTLE.
She loves and respects herself enough to not just settle down with the first man that shows her a little attention. Let’s be honest if you’ve ever met a high value woman, you’ll know she’s not short of attention, but her head doesn’t get turned by the attention she is being lavished with. Why? Because she wants a man that doesn’t just talk but acts, someone who doesn’t just say but shows how he feels.
SHE’S SELF-SUFFICIENT.
Her goal in life has always been and will always be to take care of herself without any help. That doesn’t mean she won’t let you take care of her. No, it just means that if you were foolish enough to leave a woman like her. She would happily continue with life as she knows it.
SHE HAS HIGH STANDARDS.
A high value woman knows what she brings to the table, and she wants you to bring your A-game too. Please don’t mistakenly think this woman is uncompromising, she is quite the opposite. But the one thing she won’t compromise on is what she wants and what she deserves – a man that can match her energy, drive, and love. She knows she deserves to be filled the same way she pours.
SHE’S WELL BALANCED.
She’s the type of woman that has both emotional and intellectual intelligence. She also recognises the difference between the two and why they’re so important. This is not to say she doesn’t get upset, angry or cry. She feels all these emotions and more. The only difference is she understands the importance of acknowledging and controlling your feelings and not letting them control you.
SHE WON’T PUT UP WITH YOUR NONSENSE.
She sets healthy boundaries. If you lie, she’ll know and that’s the one thing she won’t tolerate. If you want to be with a high value woman you should understand transparency is a must. Always show up as you, don’t send your representative, she’ll smell the bulls**t a mile off and she’ll feel no way in telling you.
SHE TREATS EVERYONE THE SAME.
She understands that everyone plays a part in her life. She believes in giving everyone a fair chance but doesn’t suffer fools gladly. It doesn’t matter whether you’re the receptionist in her office or the CFO she’ll treat you the same because she believes in bringing people up not keeping them down.
SHE’S CLASSY AND SEXY.
The epitome of style and grace. As beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside. She is dignified in every situation. She’s sure to taste her words before she spits them out because she knows the tongue has no bones but is strong enough to hurt someone.
SHE EMBRACES HER FLAWS.
She is full of imperfections. Some might call them flaws, but she sees them as badges of honour. Her imperfections are what make her the beautiful being you see in front of you today. And because she has embraced her imperfections, others have grown to love them too. She knows she must accept them before she can expect anyone else will.
SHE’LL NEVER CHASE YOU. SHE’S NOT LIKE OTHER WOMEN.
– Just because the others were tolerant of being treated in any other way than they deserved, doesn’t mean she will be.
– Just because the women who have superseded her, have been ok to wait around while you made up your mind, whether they were good enough to be with, doesn’t mean she will.
Know this, if you treat her like an option, she’ll leave you with no choice. She’s no one’s second best.
One thing’s for sure, women like this don’t come along every day. There’s something intoxicating about a woman with high value. Once you meet her, you never quite forget her. She’s not a diamond in the rough, She’s the real deal.
A real man knows they can only accomplish so much on their own, but by having a high value woman by their side they can scale greater heights. A bad woman can break them but a good woman, she can make them. Together they are unstoppable.
Be the high value woman that not only champions herself but others too. Sparkle like the diamond you deserve to be and the diamond that he so desperately wants and needs.
Thank you for rubbing the dust off this coal to sparkle, might blind some, so be it, true vision will always see the light, be it a beautiful strong women or A handsome true man 👊🏾🙏❤️